End of the line

....... U kno wat... Im fuckin done wit this shit...
Y the hell did i blog in the first fuckin place???
Theres no fuckin point...... I quit

u assholes dont need 2 kno how my day went
the only thing u need 2 kno is tht my day sucked
and i cut myself.... N other shit.... Thts it

y the hell should i explain my fuckin day 2 u??

I dont have any motivation.....

Sooo fuck u all.... I fly solo.... My missions are highly classified

none of u have the authorization to gain access to my intel....

Screw u all.....
MSGT Vallestero out....
SEMPER FI..... carry on....
C ya on the battlefield....

Tough shit... Beginning of the end... Therapy

These past few days have just been full of excitement, pain and suffering....

Its been days after saturday's winter olympics... Hahaha.... My last blog actually...

and my leg still hurts like a bitch.....
Its really tough walkin up and down stairs
i took some pills.... But they didnt work.... Yay drugs hahaha ^_^
i might need to take more.....-_-.... Oh no.... Im becomin a drugee lawlz jkjk ^_^
.... Or am i ?.....

my therapy is going very well.... Shootin pplz as much as i can....
Risin thru the ranks..... Yea.... Itz awesome....
And so am i....

My therapy's the best.... Makes me feel rly good at the end of the day

...... Im so excited.... Jus dont even kno
U DONT FUCKIN KNO!!!!

.....soon ill b gittin a computer..... Yesh!!!!!!! 1TB of memory
i dont think i need tht much... But i dont care

i even customized it
gaming keyboard, 22" monitor with a webcam.....
Yea!!!!! Talkin about it gits me excited.....
Sooooo many games 2 download.......soooo little time

he only bad thing is tht it costs $1464..... I almost had a heart attack after lookin at the price
i almost killed my mother wit it too hahaha ^_^

of course "wAts gonna b my 1st downloaded game???"
uhhhhh MARIO!!!!! lawlz ^_^
mario's the shit and will always b the shit

my italian soulmate lawlz ^_^

thts it!!!! New computer, my Ass still hurtz, and i love my therapy!!!

Latahz

Special olympics fun ^_^...... Pain afterwards X_X

Today was the SHIT!!!!!

I was shootin som russian bitches and som MEC bitches on B Company in the mornin

.... Horray therapy!!!!
I kno..... My therapy's awesome.... And kicks ass...^_^
hehehehe..... Im on a roll in B Company......


Then in the afternoon.... Ty, tony, james, & kevin all chilled at my place....

We were shootin bitches 4 a while.....

Then we went to the park tht was close 2 tys house

and we used sk8 boards wit the bottom parts off and used the boards as snowboards.... ^_^

it was very fun.... The snow was frozen and hurt like a bitch when we fell.. But i dont care

..... We took alot of vids of us dickin around and hurting ourselves... But it was fun.... ^_^

it was better than the special winter olympics games lolz ^_^

of course i fucked up my legs..... So its really hard 2 walk...

All of the videos were really funny...... Cuz none of us knew how to snowboard hahahahaha ^_^

....... Then james went down shirtless..... So everyone was laughin....^_^

my fingers were numb for like 4 hours lawlz ^_^..... Amazing

and tht it!!!! Today was awesome..... I wanna do it again real soon ^_^

bein a jackass and injuring urself for no reason kicks ass

latahs

Sad times... Exams... Troubles and outcomes

Itz sad..... How life can sometimes b so short...
My bird died yesterday mornin...... Soo sad :(
but... He was old.... 7 years is a long time...
Hes in a better place now.... With my father... :'^(

it makes me think..... Was 46 years long enough for dad?

..... I dont think so...... 16 yrs isnt long 4 me....

Cutz r healin fine..... Stopped after she broke up wit me

... They may become scars tho.....
...... Good..... Thts a permanent remider of something i shouldnt have done in the first place

last of my exams tommoro..... Shouldnt b tht hard..... Didnt study
(of course... Who studies??)

im even more positive than i was b4..... Thts a great thing....

But the question still remains
was it really worth dating her???
...... Well i did do some thinkin......
And my answer is........ No....
...... I gave up too much.... And became super vulnerable
..... Next time..... I wont give up anything.....
I wont b vulnerable...... And ill make it last......
Im a warrior.... Not some fuckin softie.......
Im buildin up defenses.... And stayin strong.....

Im a soldier.... Not someones bitch......

Gotta go pplz.... Gotta rest up for my exams.....
Might chill wit skittlez 2morro...
Latahs

Shazam!!... Exams... Troubles

Yes!!!!! I fixed my spanish project today....
Srry i havent blogged in a few days.....
U ppl r boring..... U dont leave comments...

Quote of the day: " an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind"- Ghandi

i like wat im doin wit these blogs now.... Quotes, positive things about my day.....
I like it

..... But.... Even tho she broke up wit me....
...... I think.......

I still miss her.......

I kinda think about the relationship from time to time
and i figured out somthin......
I gave up alot 2 b wit her....
...... Was it worth it?????

Well i should tell u wat i lost so u dont think im a dick.... Hehehe

well.... I lost my positivity and recieved her negativity after it was destroyed
i relied too much on my rule #1.... when u dont kno, go wit the flow...
I started to care for stuff again....(somthin i didnt want to return)
i couldnt shoot ppl cuz i played a game where i had 2 kill russians
.... Which sucked.... But now i can again

itz like my drug.... And therapy..... And... Well everything....

With all of those things tht had to happen..... Was it really worth it???
Was it worth losing my positivity???
Was it worth losing the ability to shoot ppl and not feel bad???

....... I guess......

Idk
i need pplz help.... Leave me a comment.....
Tell me waz it worth it???

Idk...... I did have fun
..... She also was the first girl i ever dated
.... And i learned alot about datin too....

........ Idk...... It kinda was worth it....... Idk

well.... Thts it.....
Tnx 4 readin.... Peace pplz

........jus hatin....

....... She hates me......
Im guessin tht in a few days shes gonna dump me.....
I can tell.....
Just cuz wat i did..... Is it rly tht bad??....
Ugghhhhh..... Well.... Idk...........

But..... If she does............ I understand......... :(

shes super pissed tho

i tried to tell her somethin...... But she told me to go away.....

...... I was gonna apologize..... But..... I guess itll have to wait
..... Ill let her cool down for a few days.... And then ill talk
.... It seems like the best way to do it.....

……….…… idk............

Either tht........ Or ill just be wit skittlez if it doesnt work......
............... Who knows???........ Maybe i can....... Fix this.....
Ohhhhhh i hope i can fix this
....... B4 itz 2 late......

I guess thts all tht happened today
Lataz

Watever.....-_-

Ugghhhh..... Froze my ass off in the mornin......
...... I need to go get more pills......
eeww..... This fuckin snow needs to go away....

I liked it better when it was summer.....
Too bad i injured myself over the summer....
Whoooo.... -_-
2 injuries tht gave me concussions..... I think...

*sigh*.....my summer was so depressing.....
U dont kno how it feels......
she doesnt kno how it feels....(Cuz she doesnt care..... Never did..... :(.... no love....)
... Noone knows how it feels

knowing tht your father will never walk thru your back door
again......
Knowing tht u werent there when he died.....
Knowing tht you could have done something to help.... But didnt think about it...
......i feel so useless.....
Ahhhhhh god...... This is destroying me inside.... :(
I miss my father.... Nothings the same........ :(
my life is so terrible..... :'^(

..... I need skittlez here..... i love tht chick....crazee ass hair color..... Lawlz.... So amazing......soooooo greeeen.....^_^
Shes the only one who can put me in my happy place....
We understand each other....We have the same problems
We have crazy parents..... We both know how it feels being the only cool person in a place.....
Soooo much in common.....
i should suprize her wit my british accent tomorro..... She'd love it...... Bein british and all.... ^_^

Steelers arent goin to the playoffs.....
But theres always next year....

Quote of today:
"History is filled with liars.... It takes one good lie, and a river of blood to make history"
..... Everyones a liar..... Were all subject to it....... Nobodys innocent... Noone ever was.... Noone ever will...

........sigh...................

............. Idk wat else to say............
I hope tomorrows better........
Plz be there skittlez........
plz....